Temple University Excerpts from The Histories by Herodotus Essay

There is the instruction of this essay.

Background

When Xerxes decides to conquer Greece, a certain Mardonius is particularly eager for this invasion to take place. Mardonius will always argue that the Persians can overcome the Greeks but he will always be unlucky. It turns out that Xerxes’ most cold-blooded and effective commander is a certain Artemisia, who happens to be a woman.

Instructions

Write a 1500 word essay in 5 paragraphs describing how Mardonius’ and Artemisia’s paths cross. Citing Herodotus, briefly summarize the part that each of these 2 play in the invasion of Greece. Speculate as to why you think Mardonius is ineffective at war and why Artemisia is effective.

Some additional thoughts regarding how to write a successful paper:

Write a very hasty introduction. This is your paragraph 1. You are probably going to change it once you’ve written the next 4 paragraphs. It’s only to get you started.

Mardonius—make sure you have highlighted the moments in Herodotus where we meet him. Identify the moments that enable you to introduce him in Paragraph 2.

Artemisia—make sure you have highlighted the moments in Herodotus where we meet her. Identify the moments that enable you to introduce her in Paragraph 3.

Speculative paragraph—here you want to identify the moments that best explain why these 2 characters end up as they do.

Conclusion—here you briefly wrap up your essay. Once you have written your 3 body paragraphs (Mardonius, Artemisia + your speculative paragraph) and your conclusion, you may find that your introduction can and should be reworked.

Writing—I’m only going to mention 1 small trick: verb tense consistency. You are summarizing and analyzing events that presumably happened 2500 years ago. Imagine that your essay is a movie which contains a series of scenes. In order for these scenes to convince your reader that they are all part of a single coherent movie, you must choose a base verb tense and stick to it. If you write, for example, “Mardonius said,” and then, “Artemisia replies,” you will have gone from simple past to simple present for no logical reason. It will be as if you are creating 2 separate movies. I recommend (but I do not insist) that you use the simple present as your base tense. “God says.” “Adam says.” “Stanton writes.” “Wollstonecraft writes.” Here is how this would work for the essay you are about to write: “Artemisia is the commander of 5 ships. It happens that she inherited the tyranny of Halicarnassus from her husband.”

I want you to based on the first draft I give to you to revise this essay.

Here is the comment that professor gave me last time:

you bring lots of backstory to this essay. I would like you to minimize the backstory and drill patiently into the characters of your 2 main figures, Do not address questions to your reader in an academic paper. Just focus on the those two characters.